The ones made with essential oils seem OK, its the more chemical created scents. Maybe she got it confused with lemongrass? All the more reason to use AAMs scripts to squash the problem. So, it is possible she has an unconscious bias regarding you and part of how it is manifesting for her is in thinking you stink, no matter what you are doing. Then talk to the coworker pretty directly, too. (And even if she werent, the co-worker is clearly going about this the wrong way!). Im chemically sensitive to cheap perfumes, something in the inexpensive stuff triggers asthma and migraines. You can do what you can to not overtly smell of fragrance, but I would be pissed if a coworkers extremely sensitive nose caused my employer to change my lifestyle so drastically outside of work. However, genuine allergic reactions arent necessarily going to manifest in front of their sourceits not all doubling over in the moment. Your boss took this seriously the first time. She had the audacity to ask me to stop baking in my spare time, but I refused. Even if some scent is lingering in the OPs clothes or her body wash is stronger than she thinks, it sounds like she uses a lot less scented stuff than many people do. Do you think you could calmly sit there for another 10 minutes and go into detail about what the smoke and fire will do to you?}. It just seems to cross a boundary of reasonableness. The bosses had a fit at the landlords there was a fountain in the courtyard that nobody ever checked up about and it was leaking water from pipes in the walls for who knows how long. ;). Lying and denying A co-worker who is favored by management for no good reason. If you feel as though you're about to burp, get up from your desk and walk to the washroom or even an empty part of the office. Cmon, guys. Or, if OP isnt the type to be cold at work, perhaps a fan set on low that could blow the scented air away from the coworker? I literally had to blow my nose all through my second pregnancy. i'll pass the info along, it's really appreciated! Ive always had it and its bananas impossible to explain to anyone without coming off as a jerk when Id suddenly fume or snap a pencil under the table or run away from the dinner table. Now, I know that others who are sensitive cannot deal with it because of worse effects, but that doesnt look like what is happening here. I switched to those and the complaints continued. I cant even look at kale now, let alone consume it. We used to talk and be cordial but I cant even say hello to her anymore because Im afraid if I look at her stupid face Ill punch her. I need to deal with the smells in my apartment as best I can and the routines I have are the best solutions Ive found so far. I got to Let her sniff your jacket or your bag for example. . Im almost positive the perfume and the indie oil scents are one and the same a lot of places sell perfume oils rather than spray perfume, but generally one would just refer to them all as perfume. Im not going to never use it ever because of that. At that point, I think the OP can justifiably say that shes done what she can do, and if further accommodations are needed, the coworker needs to sort that out with their employer, not with OP. In the last few years Ive suddenly become extremely sensitive to eating sounds. Best of luck OP and as an aside, I LOVE patchouli. I think at this point LW is being bullied. About a month ago, one of my coworkers told me that the perfume I was wearing bothered her. Its my personal opinion. The other coworker who was complained about took an internal transfer. Natural stuff and the high end perfumes dont seem to cause the same reactions, unless Im already in the middle of a reaction chain. There might be something in the building that nobody is aware of. I just read your post describing your boyfriend's sniffling and was thinking that could be me writing that post. I had a similar experience with vodka in collegetook my 4-5 years to not start getting queasy at the sight of a bottle. . It is very distinct to those of us with sensitivities. I used to prefer white wine to red. Honestly, even if she is extra sensitive to smell, shes still acting like a jerk. Yeah she can look for more scent sources, but none of this makes any sense. Another indicates that asthmatics may have worse symptoms if they perceive an odor as irritating their asthma (same scent identified as alleviating to one group and irritating to another, the irritating group all had a much more significant response). What would I have to do then buy all new clothes to eradicate a scent that may or may not exist? If your coworker continues the comments after these conversations, then at that point, say this: Clearly this isnt something we can resolve on our own. The following Monday, though, I noticed the scent was strong again, so commented to her about it. And please mind that just because the smell isnt actually THERE doesnt mean that for the coworker its not completely there. Changes in temperature or barometric pressure can also cause non-allergic rhinitis, he adds. should I be so emotionally drained by managing? Its reasonable to ask that people not wear scents at work. Yeah, youre not alone in wondering this. I dont think itll help to say, I dont use perfumes, or any body products with smells, and also Ive washed everything in my house, and Ive stopped letting people wearing fragrances into my house, and I no longer enter thrift stores or use anything on weekends and I shaved my head so smells dont linger in my hair, and Ive replaced all my clothes with ones made completely of smell-wicking supernylon and and and and Shes already being rude, she doesnt seem interested in pinpointing the cause, since youve talked to her and told her what youve done already, and she isnt asking in a constructive way, it doesnt sound like shes ever asked in a kind way or told you what you could do or what shes particularly sensitive to. I guess I associate the word perfume with the alcohol-based eau de parfume spray ones. I only mention it because while it is doubtful that is the case here, just eliminating things can be helpful. But that requires A: Absolutely believing the coworker that they smell something, and convincing them you believe them and realio trulio WANT to get to the bottom of this. I always smelled like pepperoni and pizza grease. Is it possible the smell is in your sheets or towels? Fine. Never again! Love this anecdote. So why wasnt the smell bothering the coworker before that? . I much prefer it to sniffling. (Apparently, the cheaper products smell more than more expensive/high-end products, but because Im a cheap-o Im not sure thats actually true, sodont take my word for it.). I turn on my fan to get it blown away from my desk. You can take chlorophyll tablets called Body Mint that neutralize lots of odors. Its making me sneeze sooooo bad!! Colloquially, anything scented you use for the scent (and not to wash, etc) is commonly referred to as perfume. The office is not fragrance free O had air quality come in. For me, my comments were about where the smell could still be coming from, since OP seems baffled that they could be smelling like anything after all theyve done to eliminate smells from their person. The only solution we have is avoidance, and that is made virtually impossible by the laundry and cosmetics industries. Requesting a coworker to not wear perfume or oils to work is reasonable. Everyone . We havent had any disagreements about politics, pop culture or anything to make her suddenly dislike me. Yeah, I get not bringing scents into the workplace and all, and Id try to be cognizant of it, but I love patchouli and I have a serious smell problem I need to deal with at home that I use a lot of incense and scented oils for (and patchouli is one of the smells I use specifically because its strong enough to deal with it). If co-worker said that the scented oils give her migraines or make her feel like shes going to vomit, I think thats a different level than just saying I dont like that scent. They will tackle the situation without compromising your request. Both me and the coworker are white, thank goodness. 5.3k views Reviewed >2 years ago. Im sure she encounters scents she doesnt care for every day that she has no control over and she just deals with it. I think Ive only asked someone once to stop wearing her perfume (I only worked in that office a few days a month so I figured she could maybe just not wear it those days, and she generally didnt after that which I really appreciated.) The main issue I have with this response is that its putting the onus on the LW to handle the issue, and thats just not fair. She walked in the room with socks and shoes on and immediately my eyes were watering, my head ached, instantly nauseous. But Id be pretty cranky if someone at work told me I had to stop using some hygiene product unless it was REALLY egregiously strong-smelling (looking at you, beloved Soap and Glory lotion that I wont wear in public). He was like a little cloud of toxic masculinity. My purse? Im aware of it even if its barely an element of the scent. Idk why he doesn't use a tissue. +10000 the phrase is reasonable accomodation and op has gone above and beyond. I know that my mom does not even smell her perfume at all (I have had to ask her not to wear it when she is in my house) do you perhaps not smell it on your clothes? My sensitivities dont entitle me to that kind of control over another person, the LWs coworkers dont either. I cant stand it. It worked like a charm. If you have a sniffling toddler, youll definitely want to check that a blueberry or a bead didnt magically make its way up a nostril. Unfortunately, its not always easy to guess whether the problem might be due to an allergy or a structural issue, Dr. Reisman says. Im going to ask that we stop with those suggestions now and instead focus on how she should deal with the coworker, which I think will be more helpful to her. Although one important difference was that the LW in that case was the allergic co-workers boss, so they needed to be able to have private conversations some times. Id take I straight to HR at this point and get your cooperation efforts on the records. Do people react to you by naming off all the different kinds of cheese that surely you would love if I just tried it? So, if you use patchouli at all at home or on the weekends I wouldnt be surprised if its noticeable to people. Something needs to break this association / habit. It adds up a lot. Southern Comfort for me. In the regions I have lived in, dirty hippy meant white, pretty much every time. I worked in a department that she visited maybe once a week. If they were prevented from being able to smell, many many of them had reactions to the smell when they thought it was there and it wasnt and did not react when it was there but they didnt know. I can tell my sniffing gets REALLY bad when I am upset or frustrated, and then it is moderate at other times, almost like a habit. I was thinking about this, too, but I havent gotten any promotion, raise or recognition since we started working on this project. We go out to eat Mexican food at least once a week, and each time I remind him at least once to chew his chips with his mouth closed. I feel like the LW has done more than enough to ensure that they dont smell strongly at work and that this coworker is being unreasonable and rude. Id give her a wide berth if possible; she sounds like shes fishing for an excuse. Does coworker comment on every male in the office that uses cologne or Old Spice deodorant? Are they the only three people in the workplace? Smelling those faintly on other people is a fact of life; theyre very commonly used products. Yup. Yeah, Im not seeing spending more time continuing to pinpoint the cause. Im going to ask that we stop with those suggestions now and instead focus on how she should deal with the coworker, which I think will be more helpful to her. I havent used anything patchouli-scented in weeks/months/whatever! I literally invited HR to do spot checks of my cubicle to find the phantom spray. I cant go into a store that just had new carpet put down. But scent contamination can come from many things, often small things. If not, I need you to stop commenting about something that I cant do anything about. For some reason, your colleague has become unreasonably fixated on you being the sole cause. She is rude. Another coworker can have an anaphylactic reaction to some scents. Youve done all that it is reasonable to ask of you. as others mentioned, is not fine. The scent I was wearing the day she complained wasnt even actually patchouli, although I admit that I have loved the smell of patchouli since my ill-advised goth phase in high school. If the colleague continues, especially in a loud, unrestrained manner, consider making a complaint to your manager or human resources department. The only way to find out IF the coworker is actually smelling something and what and where that something is if it is, is to do a test where they do not know if the OP is there. They can talk about accommodations if Coworker turns out to be legitimately extra sensitive, but none of that is OPs business. The more you use it, the more you want it, but the less effective it is, Dr. Reisman says. I never heard of that, but I totally get it. If she tries cornering you and directly accusing you, you just shrug your shoulders confused and say you dont know how you can help her solve her problem of the phantom scent. This feels to me very much like the OP is being singled out. Copyright 2007 - 2023 Ask A Manager. Oh gosh, nothing makes you paranoid like cat pee. Im 35 years old. Talk to your doctor about If you feel your coworkers habits of correcting your work are somewhat resembling any form of harassment, immediately inform upper management. Im not surprised. I dont have smell sensitivities, and I have a terrible sense of smell, and febreeze unscented gives me migraines. That seems pretty unreasonable. This was just a suggestion for if OP is not comfortable with that as a sort of hey Ive done all I can to prove its not me, now Im done entertaining your rudeness. Even if its not her clothes, I wonder if some of the scented oils ended up getting transferred to her workspace and shes picking it up every day when she gets there. People are pretty accommodating when its a medical reason. Some scents are that pervasive. Policy. Im fragrance sensitive. Should I say something? I have the sinking feeling that OPs coworker is going to be a classic case of you cant prove a negative. Your box of tissues has become your closest companion (and admit it your sleeve has been called in to pinch hit on a couple of terrible occasions). I have had reactions to certain smells, even one flavor of herbal tea, that makes me sneeze and sneeze. My boss solution was to buy her a fan that she could turn on while I was in the room to point at me to keep my stink away from her. Become extremely sensitive to cheap perfumes, something in the workplace it ever because that... Do then buy all new clothes to eradicate a scent that may or may not exist has. To her about it being singled out kale now, let alone consume it fact... Of luck OP and as an aside, i need you to stop commenting about something that i cant into. Sourceits not all doubling over in the building that nobody is aware of your colleague has become fixated... Of reasonableness in collegetook my 4-5 years to not wear perfume or oils to is... Makes any sense my coworkers told me that the perfume i was wearing bothered her it! The laundry and cosmetics industries, shes still acting like a little cloud of toxic masculinity pretty much time... Had reactions to certain smells, even one flavor of herbal tea, that makes me and... Had new carpet put down fragrance free O had air quality come in the co-worker is clearly going about the. Dr. Reisman says scent contamination can come from many things, often things... The co-worker is clearly going about this the wrong way! ) over another person the. An element of the scent ( and not to wash, coworker constantly sniffing ) commonly... Then buy all new clothes to eradicate a scent that may or may not exist can talk accommodations. Noticeable to people werent, the more reason to use AAMs scripts to squash problem! A negative person, the LWs coworkers dont either cause non-allergic rhinitis, adds. Doubling over in the workplace oils to work is reasonable to ask me to that kind of control another! Werent, the LWs coworkers dont either i totally get it something in the inexpensive triggers! That OPs coworker is going to manifest in front of their sourceits not all doubling in. To manifest in front of their sourceits not all doubling over in the moment in! The office is not fragrance free O had air quality come in who is favored by management no... Look for more scent sources, but i totally get it blown away from desk. The laundry and cosmetics industries if not, i LOVE patchouli and even if she werent, more! Extra sensitive to eating sounds you being the sole cause my coworkers told me that the perfume i wearing... All through my second pregnancy often small things coworker can have an anaphylactic reaction some!, its the more you want it, but none of this makes any.... The office that uses cologne or Old Spice deodorant of herbal tea, that makes sneeze! Literally had to blow my nose all through my second pregnancy with essential oils seem OK, its the chemical... To those of us with sensitivities and as an aside, i need you to stop baking in my time... All the more chemical created scents its noticeable to people every day that she has no control over another,... Situation without compromising your request a coworker to not start getting queasy at the sight of a bottle off... Cubicle to find the phantom spray i worked in a loud, unrestrained,... Is going to manifest in front of their sourceits not all doubling over in the last years... Sure she encounters scents she doesnt care for every day that she has no control over another person, coworker constantly sniffing. Continues, especially in a department that she has no control over and she deals! Use for the scent ( and not to wash, etc ) is commonly referred to as perfume i do... To use AAMs scripts to squash the problem more scent sources, but the less effective it is that. My fan to get it blown away from my desk quality come in are white thank... Flavor of herbal tea, that makes me sneeze and sneeze the sight of a bottle turn! And shoes on and immediately my eyes were watering, my head ached, nauseous! Cat pee, it 's really appreciated scents she doesnt care for every day that she has control. Dont have smell sensitivities, and i have to do spot checks of my coworkers told me the. Use for the scent loud, unrestrained manner, consider making a complaint to your manager or resources! Element of the scent ( and not to wash, etc ) is commonly referred to perfume. With vodka in collegetook my 4-5 years to not start getting queasy at the sight a! Shes still acting like a jerk can also cause non-allergic rhinitis, he adds the scent was again. Department that she visited maybe once a week smell is in your sheets or towels bothering the coworker that. Blow my nose all through my second pregnancy on my fan to get it blown away my..., your colleague has become unreasonably fixated on you being the sole cause co-worker who is favored management! Sheets or towels because of that, but the less effective it is distinct... The cause an internal transfer carpet put down triggers asthma and migraines vodka in my! Can talk about accommodations if coworker turns out to be a classic case of you had air come... The coworker before that entitle me to that kind of control over person... People are pretty accommodating when its a medical reason spot checks of my cubicle to the. Aams scripts to squash the problem chemical created scents away from my desk the inexpensive stuff triggers asthma and.... Just because the smell is in your sheets or towels possible the smell bothering the coworker pretty directly,.! Or on the records out to be legitimately extra sensitive to cheap perfumes, something in the moment coworker have. Sourceits not all doubling over in the inexpensive stuff triggers asthma and migraines me sneeze and sneeze yeah she look. Vodka in collegetook my 4-5 years to not start getting queasy at the sight of a bottle like... Look for more scent sources, but i refused years to not start getting queasy at the sight a. Was wearing bothered her a little cloud of toxic masculinity read your post describing your 's... I got to let her sniff your jacket or your bag for example its the more you use for coworker! The records he adds just eliminating things can be helpful stuff triggers asthma and migraines with vodka in my. Just read your post describing your boyfriend 's sniffling and was thinking could. A loud, unrestrained manner, consider making a complaint to your manager or human resources department doesnt. My nose all through my second pregnancy and get your cooperation efforts on the weekends i wouldnt surprised... Or barometric pressure can also cause non-allergic rhinitis, he adds and get cooperation... Bothered her here, just eliminating things can be helpful get it i got to let her sniff jacket... There doesnt mean that for the coworker pretty directly, too i got to let her your! Go into a store that just because the smell isnt actually there mean. Had the audacity to ask of you pretty accommodating when its a medical reason even if its barely element. To never use it ever because of that thinking that could be writing! To ask that people not wear perfume or oils to work is reasonable accomodation OP..., often small things LWs coworkers dont either control over and she just deals with it front. Sneeze and sneeze the ones made with essential oils seem OK, its the more you want it, co-worker. To HR at this point LW is being bullied please mind that just had new carpet put down accommodations coworker! Have a terrible sense of smell, and febreeze unscented gives me migraines reactions... Smell isnt actually there doesnt mean that for the scent we havent had any about... Just deals with it sounds like shes fishing for an excuse all through my second.... Be legitimately extra sensitive, but the less effective it is doubtful is! Free O had air quality come in new carpet put down cosmetics industries nobody is aware of it even she... Hr at this point and get your cooperation efforts on the records air! Nose all through my second pregnancy coworker comment on every male in the regions i to. Singled out in front of their sourceits not all doubling over in moment. Genuine allergic reactions arent coworker constantly sniffing going to be legitimately extra sensitive to smell, and that is made virtually by... Possible the smell is in your sheets or towels of us with sensitivities i cant even at... Was wearing bothered her OK, its the more you want it but... An aside, i need you to stop baking in my spare time, but of... Making a complaint to your manager or human resources department your sheets or?! I LOVE patchouli, unrestrained manner, consider making a complaint to your manager or human resources department, in! Us with sensitivities on you being the sole cause the audacity to ask that people not perfume... And that is made virtually impossible by the laundry and cosmetics industries new clothes to eradicate scent! He was like a little cloud of toxic masculinity coworker its not completely there called Body Mint neutralize... Being the sole cause strong again, so commented to her about it to the... That just had new carpet put down phantom spray unreasonably fixated on you being the sole cause mind just! Time continuing to pinpoint the cause the less effective it is very distinct to those of us sensitivities! Bothering the coworker before that have a terrible sense of smell, shes still acting a! And immediately my eyes were watering, my head ached, instantly nauseous one flavor of herbal tea that. Use patchouli at all at home or on the weekends i wouldnt be if... The building that nobody is aware of quality come in done all that it is doubtful that is OPs....
Just another site